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My personality test:

“There is still reasonable evidence linking Hitler to Iraq and WMDs.”
~ Dick Cheney on Hitler



“Pee in a Goddamn bottle! Shove that bottle under your coat, and you'll be toasty warm all night.”
~ Bear Grylls


“The death of one man is a tragedy. The death of a million is probably a typo. If it isn't, it's cause for a kegger.”
~ Stalin in an email to Hitler, c. 1938.


“I find it hard to fathom as to why, or how for that matter, the masses, intensely ignorant as they are, practically worship one Albert Einstein for being of exceptionally intelligent as a result of the theory of relativity despite the fact that, due to their ongoing insistence to be ignoramuses, they do not understand it. If they were to worship all those whom their miniscule minds could not comprehend then I submit to you that they should all worship me, Immanuel Kant, seeing as I cannot formulate a sentence that any of you could have a hope of understanding. It's just not @£$%ing fair damnit!”
~ Immanuel Kant on his jealousy of Einstein


“Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by the age of 18”
~ Albert Einstein



“Third Reich? The Third Reich was for nerds. Soviet Russia, now there's a treat for the real gangstas!”
~ Stalin on The Third Reich



“Ach, the Third Reich, where men were men and Jews were nervous”
~ Himmler on Third Reich


"FIRST, WE TAKE FRANCE! AND THEN, WE FIND NEMO!
~Hitler


“Drink Vodka, Fuck America!”
~ Lenin on Communism


“Give a man some fish and you feed him for a day. Kick a man to death and you never have to feed him at all.”
~ Putin on poverty


“Why are my balls glowing?”
~ Confused tourist to his wife after visiting Chernobyl